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All right, I've had enough. It's time for me to issue a decree:
Henceforth, programmers who wish to use the clipboard must be licensed in the same fashion as automobile drivers are licensed by the Department of Motor Vehicles. (Yes, yes, we call it the Secretary of State's Office here in Michigan; but more people know it as the DMV.)
1. Before you may use the clipboard to copy code, you must take 20 hours of classroom instruction on how not to use your clipboard.
2. Before you may be fully licensed to use your clipboard, you must undergo a six-month probationary period during which you may only use the clipboard with a grown up, licensed programmer observing your use of the clipboard.
3. Upon completing your probationary period, you may apply for a clipboard license at your nearest Department of Responsible Programmers. There your code will be examined for any signs of clipboard abuse. (Note: Unlike the tests at the DMV, this examination will not be easy. It will be brutal. You have been warned.)
4. If your code is deemed acceptable by a Responsible Programmer, you will receive a clipboard license, and be authorized to copy code as needed.
5. At any time, your code may be inspected for clipboard abuse. You will receive one (1) point for each line of unjustified code copying. If you accumulate 100 or more points, you will have to return to Clipboard School, or lose your license.
6. If at any time you accumulate 200 points, your clipboard license will be immediately revoked. You will be eligible to reapply after 1 year.
7. If at any time you accumulate 500 points, you will be shot. While we know this is harsh, it's the only economical option. We can't afford the cost of maintaining your code.
8. Clipboarding while drunk is grounds for immediate revocation of your license.
Yes, this means you!
Posted on Saturday, November 15, 2008 5:55 PM Code is not Enough | Back to top


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